


Everythin’s Bigger in Texas

by Castor_Raiden, reallygrossstuff



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Chubstuck, Fatstuck, Homestuffed, M/M, Mental Transformation, Texas, Weight Gain
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-27
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:54:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25251196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Castor_Raiden/pseuds/Castor_Raiden, https://archiveofourown.org/users/reallygrossstuff/pseuds/reallygrossstuff
Summary: John, Sollux, and Karkat haven’t seen Dave in a year, ever since he moved back home to Texas. When they see him, they get a surprise!
Relationships: Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas, Sollux Captor/John Egbert
Comments: 8
Kudos: 29





	1. Meetin’ up

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! Castor_Raiden here, once again wishing I could update my username without losing all my stuff, coming at cha with a new story! In cooperation, reallygrossstuff and myself welcome you to this story!

John cruised down the highway, humming along to some country song he didn’t know the name of on the radio. Next to him sat his boyfriend Sollux, an alien from the planet Alternia, and in the back seat, frowning hard, was Sollux’s friend (for a given definition of “friend”) Karkat. Upon the reveal of Karkat’s candy-red blood, their only option aside from execution was exile, which Karkat had accepted. Much to his surprise, Sollux had decided to accompany the shorter troll, and the two started a new life on the blue planet.

“Am I the only one who expected Dave to live somewhere... busier?” Karkat had been frowning out the window ever since they’d passed Texas’ population centres and moved into more rural territory, where they might have only seen one house for as long as five minutes before passing another isolated property. “You’d think he’d be bored out of his fucking pan living somewhere like this.”

Sollux nodded. “I thought he grew up in Houston. He said he was going back home when he left, right?” Looking out the window again, he stared at the occasional milkbeasts - cows, as the humans called them - grazing as they passed.

“Yeah, but he might’ve just moved.” John shrugged, keeping his eyes on the road. “I know if I was him I wouldn’t want to live with my bro-dad or whatever forever. It’s probably just cheaper to live out here.”

Karkat sighed again. “Please tell me we’re almost fucking there,” he whined. “I need to pee.”

“Just about,” Sollux answered, checking the map on his palmhusk. “Turn here.”

John complied, turning onto a dusty driveway and up to a low ranch house. “And here we are!” he exclaimed as he shut off and clambered out of the car.

While Karkat rushed straight to the house, clearly needing to deal with his bladder issues, John stayed by the car for a moment to take in the house. It was... rustic, more than he expected for Dave. A balcony wrapped around the building, shading the front door and some outdoor furniture from the Texan sun.

John looked around cautiously, wondering if he had gotten the right address, before his ears picked up a familiar beat from inside. He smiled. “Yup, we’re here,” he said, before knocking at the door.

The music stopped. As John knocked again, a voice called out “Comin’, I’m comin’, hold yer horses!”

John blinked. It… sounded like Dave, but there was something off about that voice that he couldn’t put his finger on. There was a twang to it that he almost never heard. And the footsteps he heard sounded MUCH too heavy to be Dave’s normally quick and feather-light feet. These were slow and ponderous as they clumped closer and closer.

Before John could wonder too much about all that, the door opened. Immediately he was reassured by the sight of Dave’s familiar aviators, the full head of shiny blond hair and the unmistakable coolkid smirk. Yep, this was definitely Dave. Though, had his face always been so... soft? John took a second look, and couldn’t help but gasp at what he saw.

A year ago, Dave had done an abrupt about-face; he wasn’t interested in any of the careers his degree would let him into, and didn’t seem to know what he wanted to do instead. The temporary solution was simple, for him to move back home to Texas and take some time to figure himself out.

When John had seen him off, he’d been a slender 6’4 young man, trim and fit, and moving at blinding speeds, wearing his signature broken disc T-shirt and skinny jeans with sneakers. John remembered wrapping his arms fully around Dave in a good-bye hug as he wished him a safe trip. Dave had bro-hugged back, given Karkat a peck on the cheek, and promised to vid-chat when he arrived (a promise Dave had kept). Then he had gotten in his car and drove off.

The Dave before them, however, looked like he could fit two of that Dave inside him. There was really no other word for it; Dave was FAT, probably the fattest person John had seen. A bulging belly covered by a red and black flannel, with the sleeves rolled up on a pair of massive arms. Legs like tree trunks, almost as big around as Dave had been, were contained in a pair of snug and faded blue jeans. The jeans themselves were tucked into a pair of huge cowboy boots, and wrapped around them was a thick leather belt with a silver buckle.

“John, dude!” Good t’see y’all!” Dave grinned. “C’mon in outta the heat!” He stood off to the side to let his guests in. “Bathroom’s first door on yer right,” he added, noticing Karkat’s struggle.

Upon hearing those words, the shorter troll bolted into the indicated room. John and Sollux were slower to enter, not quite able to tear their eyes away from their unexpectedly hefty host. It _was_ hot out, though, so eventually they both shuffled inside, single-file to make sure they didn’t accidentally bump into his gut, which seemed to take up a good half of the hallway.

“It’s, uh, really great to see you again, Dave!” John tried not to let his surprise show as he smiled up at his friend (Dave had always been tall, but he’d never really seemed it to John until now). “Though this isn’t really where I expected you to be set up, haha.”

“Yeah, well, city life was gettin’ boring and my grandparents left me this place. Got good internet and plenty o’ space for me to, ah, spread out, as it were,” he added, patting his stomach. “Certainly took some doin’ to fit in the ranch with my hobbies, but I made it work!”

“You actually work this place?” John knew Sollux had little interest for that sort of work, so he was probably asking more out of surprise - yesterday, John would have assumed that Dave had just as little care for managing an honest-to-gods country property, but here he was.

“Yup.” Dave nodded as the sound of a toilet flushing drew his attention to Karkat wiping his hands on his shirt (he had wisely forsaken his usual turtleneck sweater). With little warning, Dave seized Karkat in a big hug. “Yo, Karkles, been awhile, how ya doin’?”

Karkat flinched at the sudden hug. “Who are you and why the fuck did you eat my boyfriend?” Still, he slowly patted Dave’s shoulder, reluctantly easing into the unexpected contact. John didn’t blame him, that hug did look pretty comfy.

“Yeah, no offense Dave but you’re... a bit bigger than you were last year!” If Karkat was going to go there first, John could at least voice his surprise. “I didn’t think country living would make you let go this much.”

“Yeah, well,” Dave began as he released Karkat, “Living out here, I can just… be myself. No one around to judge me…”

“So… if this is the real you, then how’d you stay so skinny all those years I’ve known you?” John asked, curious. “I mean, you came from here, right?”

“Pretty much just dietin’, y’know?” Dave guided them further into his home as he explained, down the hall and presumably towards a living room. “Like I said, people’d judge, so I watched what I ate. Kept myself lean, worked out if I was gettin’ soft…” John peered at the framed photos they were passing, wondering if he’d see... there! A picture of Dave from before he’d met him! He was nowhere near as big in it, but he was definitely a bit pudgier than the beanpole John had first met. “Not to mention the food up in the city’s practically empty. ‘Fore I moved down here I’d forgot what a real meal tasted like!”

As Dave explained himself, the quartet entered the kitchen. It was fairly large (albeit for someone NOT of Dave’s size), with a large dining table in the middle. There were a few small chairs around it, as well as a wider one clearly meant for a certain someone. “Y’all must be famished after the long drive,” Dave commented idly, bending over to check the contents of the oven. Karkat turned red at the way Dave’s jeans hugged his rump. “I’d just put a pie in when you guys pulled up. Didn’t expect you for another while!” He grunted as he stood back up.

“Dave… can I ask, umm…” John hesitated, not wanting to be rude. “I mean, don’t answer if you don’t wanna but-“

“How much do I weigh?” Dave finished helpfully. “No need to be shy Johnny boy! Last I checked, I was about 413 pounds!”

John could hear Sollux making some hushed remark to Karkat, probably teasing him for his taste in guys, but he couldn’t pay attention to that. 413 pounds! He’d definitely never met anyone that big before, and Dave was the last person he’d expected to gain that much weight. “No way...” He forgot to watch his words, and Dave would definitely have heard the surprise in his voice, but all the Texan did was laugh.

“I can hop on a scale if you think I’m lyin’. But hey, I might weigh even more now, who knows?”

“N-no, you don’t have to do that, I believe you!” If Dave turned out to be even bigger, John didn’t think he’d be able to cope. “Sorry I asked, I promise I don’t mind or anything. I’m not going to judge.”

Dave smiled and patted John on the shoulder. “So, whatcha in the mood fer?” he asked, rooting around in the fridge. “Gettin’ kinda hungry m’self!” Dave added as his stomach rumbled audibly.

“Well, it’s your house.” John shrugged, trying not to hyperfocus on the sound or sight of Dave’s stomach. Glancing to the side, he saw Karkat still staring at Dave’s backside - possibly he hadn’t stopped. “I’ll just have whatever you feel like making!”

“Country-fried chicken it is!” Dave replied, hefting out a frier. “Yo Kar, lend me a hand?” he asked. “Lemme show ya how to make this.”

Karkat jerked out of his daze. “O-okay,” he stuttered as he approached.

John took a step back as Karkat took the brunt of Dave’s cheerful instruction, surreptitiously moving closer to Sollux. “This is, uh. Is this weird to you?”

Sollux stared at his boyfriend, pointedly lowering his shades as if to emphasise how very not human he was. “Literally everything about your culture is weird to me, John. But... this isn’t how I thought we’d meet Strider, I guess.”

“No kidding.” John laughed awkwardly. “But I mean, we’re not leaving because of this, right? It’s not that bad.”

“Not unless you wanna,” Sollux replied. “This is all new territory for me.”

It wasn’t long before the chicken was finally breaded, fried and set on the table-and oh, what a beautiful bird it was! Huge, well over the size of Dave’s head, and smelling heavenly from the spices. “Well, dig in!” Dave said, tearing off a drumstick. Karkat passed plates around and doled himself a generous helping of mashed potatoes. Sollux divvied himself a decent portion, maybe a bit more than he’d normally have, and John found himself similarly over-filling his plate without thinking, whether because he’d been peer pressured into it or because there was simply no reference for a reasonable serving size at that table.

John wasn’t expecting _bad_ food, but it still surprised him when he took a bite of the chicken and found it to be perhaps the juiciest, tastiest bird he’d ever had. That lifted his expectations enough, but he was still shocked when the potato somehow managed to be even better! Letting the heavy mash practically melt on his tongue, savouring the taste, John comforted himself that if nothing else, this new Dave was one hell of a cook.

“Wow Dave, this - _mm-mmph_ \- this is really good!” John got out between mouthfuls, seeing his reaction mirrored on two sides as both Sollux and Karkat dug into their own plates.

“Thank ye kindly!” Dave mimed tipping a hat as he cleaned his plate and stood. “If y’all need me, just holler. I’ll be in the music room down the hall.” With that, Dave rinsed his plate and waddled off. He hadn’t been gone long before the music the three guests had heard on approach resumed.

For maybe a minute that music was the only sound in the room, just loud enough to drown out the clinking of utensils as the three of them continued to eat. Eventually Karkat broke the silence, clearing his throat deliberately as he leaned forward to scoop a second helping of mash onto his plate. “Well, at least his music hasn’t changed. That’s something, I guess.”

“Yeah, that’s true...” John nodded, picking at the last morsels on his plate. He’d filled up at that point, but the food was so good he felt bad about leaving anything... “I mean it’s still him, but having something that’s the same is kind of-”

John lost track of what he was saying as the music from the other room was accompanied by a voice. Dave’s music never had vocals unless they were intentionally awful, but that... that was definitely his voice, and it was _good_.

Karkat looked stunned. “John… has Dave always been able to sing this good?”

John shook his head. “This is new…” he answered. “I guess it proves he really was a great singer before he left. Nobody is THAT bad at singing unless it’s deliberate.” Standing up, John began walking down to the music room slowly. As he approached, the lyrics started sounding familiar-the same country song John had been humming along to in the car. However, the song was mixed smoothly with Dave’s dubstep beats in a way John found pleasing to the ears.

He stopped by the door just to listen for a moment, smiling at how… relaxed Dave sounded now that he wasn’t trying to hide himself. A sudden ringing brought the singing to a halt as John flinched and darted back to the kitchen.

Like any person growing up with a family invested in baking, the key to a successful pie was getting it out of the oven as soon as it was done. John came to a halt in front of the oven and snatched on the mitts before tugging the door open. Carefully, he pulled out a steaming apple pie and licked his lips. It was perfectly made-the handiwork of a grandmother’s recipe, John could tell.

As Dave lumbered into the kitchen, Sollux used his powers to silence the timer with a flick of his psionics while John gently placed the pie on a windowsill to cool. “Shoulda expected ya to get to it first,” Dave commented idly. “Hope I got Grammy’s pie right this time! You shoulda seen my first few attempts after she and Grampa passed.” Dave glanced over at a framed photo on the wall displaying the old couple with a sad smile. “Miss ‘em a lot, though,” he added.

Karkat patted Dave on the shoulder. “You okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m cool as can be!” Dave replied.

“That hasn’t gotten any more true just because you moved out to the middle of nowhere and started wearing flannel.” Karkat said it with his usual level of bite, but even to John it sounded softer than the troll normally bothered to be. “You don’t have to be a pinnacle of fucking well-adjustedness every second of the day. Didn’t you move here to be yourself?”

“Yeah... yeah, yer right.” Dave shrugged slightly. “Still, I’m dealin. Livin’ my life, gettin’ this place into gear. Don’t worry ‘bout me, Kar, okay?” He tried for a grin, going over to examine the pie. “Worry ‘bout keepin’ yer hands to yerself ‘till this thing cools. Here, lemme show y’all round the place till then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you enjoyed, please leave a comment! Every one’s worth more than iridium bars!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The visitors get a tour of the house, and treated to more Southern hospitality.

Dave led the trio back into the hall. “You guys know where the bathroom is,” he began. “We also got a couple of guest rooms for you guys. John, Sol, I guess you two wanna share?” Getting a nod in response, Dave pointed to a few doors down the hall. “All the way down, take yer pick. Another bathroom’s down there too.” he added. “The first door on the left’s my room.”

Next stop on the tour was the door John had been standing at earlier. “This here’s my recordin’ studio!” Dave explained, a mote of pride in his voice as the three looked inside.

Contrary to the rest of the house, Dave’s studio looked rather modern. The walls were lined with acoustic panels, while Dave’s turntables and mixing board were set up against the far wall beneath a window covered by drapes. Against another wall, Dave’s high-end PC was set up atop a writing desk. Lastly, sitting neatly in the corner on a stand was a beautiful red acoustic guitar. John whistled at the sight. “Wow, Dave… this is pretty cool!”

“Yeah, used to be Grandpa’s office actually,” Dave explained as he strolled inside. “Now it’s my place to get the creative juices flowin’ or somesuch.”

“When’d you get the guitar?” Karkat asked curiously. “Looks really nice!”

“Oh, that’s another of Grandpa Strider’s,” Dave answered. “According to the will, it was supposed to be a birthday present for me a year ago, but he... never got the chance to send it.” Dave picked up the guitar and smiled at it before giving it a quick strum. “Took me a bit to learn how to play. I mean, y’all know how my music used to be, right? Yeah, when I started getting good, my tunes sounded so much better!”

Setting the guitar back down, Dave squeezed past the trio and back down the hall. “Over here we got the living room, and the rec room through there.” He gestured inside, showing a large couch and a few reclining chairs sitting in front of the fireplace. Mounted above was a flatscreen TV, and hooked up was a gaming console. Through the open doorway beyond, a fairly nice pool table stood, all set up to play. “An’ I think that just about covers it!” Dave finished. “Now, you three go git yer bags into yer rooms and I’ll go check the pie! Should be ready by now.”

John led the way back to the car, his mind still buzzing at how much Dave had changed. “Well, he definitely seems happier now, huh?” he commented. With a click of his keys, the trunk popped open and John started collecting the suitcases as Sollux grabbed his husktop bag from the back seat.

“Yeah…” Karkat agreed, extracting his bag from John’s hands as he spoke. “Weird seeing him smile, or even emote more than an amused smirk.”

“While it ain’t my style, this place certainly looks nicer than the apartment he said he grew up in,” Sollux remarked, taking a breath of the fresh air. “Remember how tiny that was in those pics he showed us? Besides, here there’s plenty of space instead of us all being crammed into a single futon.”

The three headed back inside and toward the guest rooms Dave had pointed out. There were four doorways down this hall, all of the doors left open to keep the heat from building. The closest one, which Dave went right past without offering, was likely his own room - the almost comical bed, taking up a good portion of the floorspace and with its mattress dipping severely in the middle, gave John a good hint he was right. He didn’t stop to poke around, but a lingering glance showed John a large amount of shelf and closet space, a standing fan, a stereo set and an old record player, with a number of vinyl cases stacked beside it atop the dresser, before he moved on to the rest of the hall.

“Alright guys,” John exclaimed. “Pick a room, any room.” That statement became laughable pretty quickly, as all three realised just how much Dave had planned for this visit. The room next to Dave’s had a single bed, covered in black and red sheets and piled high with quilts and pillows in an attempt to copy a troll’s pile. There was a small desk in the room as well, which John could see held a small pile of paperback romance novels. He didn’t think he’d get any awards for figuring out whose room this was meant to be.

“Well at least he’s considerate,” Karkat mumbled, entering the room and looking around. “I swear he’s just tried to copy my fucking bedroom in here.”

“He probably just wants you to feel comfortable! I think it’s really sweet he’s done this for you,” John smiled, trying to reconcile this as just Dave doting on his boyfriend, instead of some newfound love of entertaining guests.

“Are you gonna say that when you see our respiteblock?” Sollux called out from across the hall, standing in the doorway to the other spare room.

“Why wouldn’t I say... oh.” Leaving Karkat to settle into what was definitely his room, John went to stand beside Sollux and peer into the other room.

There were two beds inside, one done in John’s usual blues, while the other made up with Sollux’s gold and honey yellows. Set in between them stood a night stand with a single lamp on top. There was also a desk in this room, though it was comparatively empty - only occupied by a powerboard for Sollux to plug his electronics into. John’s bed was made with only light sheets, but Sollux, who could shiver in the middle of a heatwave, had a few extra blankets at the foot of ‘his’ bed. Looking closer, John began to suspect that Dave had made them himself; he didn’t know enough about knitting or quilting to be sure, but... somehow they just _felt_ home-made.

“Guys, pie’s ready!” Dave called out. “Come ‘n’ get it!” John and Sollux set their bags on their respective beds and joined Karkat on the way to the kitchen, where Dave was doling out slices onto plates.

“Smells perfect!” John commented, already licking his lips.

“I aim t’ please, Dave replied smoothly. “Now let’s dig in!”

John didn’t know whether it was the smell of the pie or just Dave’s enthusiasm to see their reactions, but he found himself ignoring the full meal he’d eaten less than an hour ago and taking a big bite of the slice in front of him. Immediately his eyes widened. He hadn’t had a pie this good since his grandmother had last made one before she passed. Everything from the crust to the filling seemed to be perfectly made, and from the sharp intake of breath from Karkat’s direction he could tell it wasn’t just his knowledge of baking that let him appreciate it. A glance over at Sollux showed the goldblood apparently having a religious experience, his eyes looking half-lidded through his tinted lenses as Sollux moaned in delight.

“Dave, did our grandmas share recipes with each-other?” John asked. “Cuz damn dude, this is GOOD.”

Dave shrugged. “Couldn’t rightly say, m’self,” he answered. “But I’m glad you liked it, since it’s all gone.” He pointed at the now-empty tin.

“What? But we just...” Looking down at his plate, John realised he’d taken a second slice without even noticing, and looking around the table revealed that everyone else had taken at least the same if not more, so entranced with the flavour they couldn’t help but go for seconds. “Did we really finish it so quickly?”

Dave laughed loudly, something John had yet to get used to him doing. “So good y’were wantin’ thirds, I get it. Prolly shoulda made more than one, now that I think about it. Get through one ‘a those things quick enough m’self!”

John smiled to himself as Dave continued. Accent or no, there was no mistaking a Strider Ramble™. Dave could probably talk for twenty minutes at least just on the pie and how much everyone had liked it, not even starting on any potential sidetracking he could get up to. Though hearing him talk about finishing a whole pie on his own was... distracting, to say the least. John felt ready to burst after just two slices of it, could Dave really have managed it all on his own, especially after their big dinner?

Eventually, Karkat cleared his throat. “Dave, remember to fuckin’ breathe,” he insisted. “I know you love the sound of your own voice but jegus…”

Dave paused to inhale dramatically, then grinned. “God, I missed you guys so much!” he exclaimed. “Like, Y’all have no idea!” He glanced at the oven clock and blinked before looking out the window at the setting sun. “Wow, time sure flies, don’t it?” Dave commented. “Coulda sworn you guys just got here!”

“Late?” Karkat echoed. “This is... super early, for…” Karkat’s boasting of his species’ nocturnalism trailed off into a yawn, one soon echoed by Sollux and John, as both the long day and the heavy meal began subduing them.

“How’s about we all head t’ bed?” Dave offered. “I gotta get up early anyway nowadays, and I don’t see a reason to wake y’all up unless you wanna help out ‘round the farm.”

“Ugh... wake me whenever you get up.” Karkat stretched slowly in his seat, before bringing one hand to rub his middle. “I didn’t drive all the way down here to sit around while you’re out working.”  
  
“Uh, I think you mean _I_ didn’t drive all the way down here?” John tried not to show his own exhaustion and fullness, though a few signs slipped through. “Wake me up too, we still have a ton of catching up to do!”

Three pairs of eyes turned to the last member of their little group, who looked around before crossing his arms. “Don’t even think of waking me up. I’m sleeping until noon and nobody’d better stop me.”

“But of course, yer majesty.” Dave mock-bowed and looked back at John and Karkat. “Welp, if you two plan on wakin’ up when I do, best get some shut-eye. Sollux, can you get the dishes?” Sollux nodded and collected the plates as the others headed off.

It was a minute before Sollux joined John in their room, Dave and Karkat having decided to sleep together in the former’s bed, “making up for lost time” as Dave had put it. Honestly, the less John knew about it the better.

“Well!” John was already in bed, sitting up against the headboard as he tried to get his brain to turn off. “We all got here alright, and Dave’s happy to see us, so today’s a pretty big win, right?”

“That’s one way to look at it.” Sollux bee-lined straight for his own bed, not bothering to change into pyjamas before flopping onto the covers. “Waking up early... what the fuck happened to him?”

“That’s rude.” John’s admonition lacked any bite. “He’s happy, he’s finding his way, he’s healthy... well, he seems healthy, even with... you know.”

“That’s true,” Sollux admitted. “Still, how’d he put on THAT much that fast?” he asked.

“Question for another day, honeybee,” John replied, smiling at the faint yellow blush Sollux developed from the pet name. “For now, we sleep. Good night!”

“... night.” Sollux clicked off the lamp, settling the room into a comfortable darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 is here! Feel free to comment what you think, or leave a kudos if you liked it.
> 
> AdenHTaylor: https://www.furaffinity.net/user/AdenHTaylor/  
> reallygrossstuff: https://www.furaffinity.net/user/damiencade/


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Early morning farm work, and a video game tournament.

“John… Wakey wakey…” John blearily cracked his eyes open to see a large blurry figure standing above him. Before he could scream, the figure handed John his glasses, revealing it to be Dave. “C’mon man… you said ya wanted to help out this mornin’!” Dave whispered.

“Alright, alright…” John replied softly. “Lemme get dressed.”

“Don’t wear dark colors,” Dave advised, leaving the room. “Coffee’s waitin’ for ya in the kitchen.”

John took a minute more to wake up before swinging his legs out of the bed, trying not to wake Sollux as he slowly dressed. He yawned and stretched as he meandered down the hall. There was indeed coffee in the kitchen, as well as Karkat, looking as tired as John felt. It was barely light outside the window!

“Good morning to you too.” John smiled weakly, spooning a few heaps of sugar into his mug before taking a few long gulps to wake himself up.

“I’ve changed my mind, there’s no fucking way this is Dave. Dave would never be up before the gogdamn sun.” Karkat grumbled into his own mug, even more irate than usual from the early hour.

“Don’t be like that.” John nudged him lightly. “So Dave’s got better sleeping habits, that doesn’t make him a whole other person.” Karkat slouched into his seat at that, and John took the opportunity to look him over subtly. He didn’t normally pay a lot of attention to Karkat’s clothes, but they definitely looked... tighter, than normal. His normal sweater might’ve covered it, but he was without it this morning, likely remembering last night’s heat. With it out of the way, John could see the sleeves of Karkat’s shirt pinching his arms very slightly, the tiniest sliver of grey peeking out between his shirt and jeans. Not a lot, but more than John would’ve expected from one good meal and a big dessert.

Karkat stretched slowly, either not noticing or not caring about the few extra pounds he’d put on. “Whatever. I’m still not buying his whole ‘this is the real me’ thing.”

“Aw, Karkles, babe…” Dave spoke up from behind Karkat. “Cherry pop, it’s still me!” he said lovingly.

Karkat looked conflicted, but didn’t waver. “Okay prove it. Where’d you learn that name?”

Dave thought for a moment, clicking his tongue. “Terezi told me. When you were headin’ to Earth, TZ told me t’ call ya that just to get a rise outta ya.” He chuckled. “The SCREECH you made, think I busted a lung!” Dave smiled. “An’ if that ain’t enough, how ‘bout this?”

Dave unbuttoned his shirt to reveal the white tank top below, leaving his arm bare. Emblazoned on his shoulder was an all-too-familiar tattoo: the Alternian symbol of Sagiries in indigo blue. John had a similar tattoo of the sign for Arus on his own shoulder.

Around Dave’s neck was a pendant bearing Karkat’s Cancer symbol, matching the record pendant Karkat wore. John remembered when the two had gotten them made after they officially started going out. He and Sollux had settled for wearing rings with each other’s Alternian sign on them.

Karkat’s eyes widened at the sight. Any doubt that this was Dave, even the barest, tongue-in-cheek denial, couldn’t stand up to those clear signs. No matter his size or manners this was clearly Dave, just as invested in Karkat as he’d ever been. “Gog I missed you so much!” he blurted out, before rushing around the table to tackle Dave in a tight hug, red tears brimming in his eyes.

Dave smiled and patted Karkat on the back. “‘S okay, cherry pop, I’m here… I’m here… I missed ya too, told you last night, din’ I?” He let Karkat keep clinging, rubbing slow circles on the troll’s back. “Get yer huggin’ in now ‘fore I get all gross from workin’, alright? Things can wait a few minutes.”

John shifted awkwardly in his chair, causing faint creaks. He felt like he was intruding on a private moment. “So… what exactly ARE we doing today?” John asked.

Dave looked over to John with a smile, clearly comforted by having Karkat so close. “Well, if ya wanna get started on yer own, I think the apple trees need some pickin’. There’s some crates I use fer carryin’ em, you think you could go out an’ fill em up?”

“Sure thing!” John gave a thumbs up and drained his mug. He quickly headed out back and took a deep breath. “Gonna be a good day, I think,” he commented idly, before spotting the empty crates next to the porch. “Now, where are… ah, there’s the trees!”

With mild effort, John grabbed a couple crates and hauled them over to the orchard. The apples dangling from each branch were about the size of his fist, all a beautiful ripe red. John whistled appreciatively at the sight and smell. “Dave took to this like a fish to water…” he said to himself as he reached up and started twisting the apples free.

After only a few apples freed John’s back felt sore from bending to put them in the crates, giving him even more respect for Dave apparently doing this regularly. As well, there were more than a few apples he couldn’t reach from the ground, and looking around didn’t turn up any handy step-ladder to use. Of course, Dave was probably tall enough to get them all down no problem, but John resigned himself to doing what he could until Dave either took over or pointed him towards a ladder.

Eventually, Dave and Karkat exited the house and approached, the latter carrying a step stool. “Think this might help?” Karkat called out.

“I don’t want ya’ to kill yer back, dude!” Dave added. “Sorry I din’ send you out with this, didn’t even think ‘a you not reachin’.” He rubbed the back of his neck almost bashfully.

John shrugged, trying not to feel awkward about what was really only a tiny imposition. “It’s nothing really, I was managing alright.”

“Well sure, but you gotta be able t’ stay with it. Here, I’ll hold the crate, keep ya from bending so much.” Dave bent to pick up the crate - it was never not going to be funny watching Karkat get flustered staring at Dave’s butt - and hefted it with ease up into John’s reach, making the process of apple picking less painful and much faster. Fortunately, the orchard wasn’t that big, with only eight full-grown trees, and with Dave’s help, the job was done fairly soon.

“Good work, John!” Dave congratulated his friend with a pat on the back. “You go on and take a breather, Karkat and I can handle the next bit.”

Instead of heading back to the house, John chose to push at his back and follow Karkat and Dave to the chicken coop, where a faint clucking noise could be heard. “Okay Karkles, yer job is to go in and get the eggs when I set out the food.”

To say the troll looked apprehensive would be an understatement. “You want me to go IN there with those things?” He was probably trying to look furious, but as the clucking rose in volume all Karkat seemed able to do was glance towards the coop with barely-veiled fear.

“I sure do! You’ll be fine, promise. Ya got yer boots on if they try t’ bite, and they’ll be too int’rested in breakfast to try anyway.” Dave slapped Karkat on the back. He  _ was _ wearing boots, John noticed, likely borrowed from Dave judging by the slight roominess. “‘Sides, it’s gettin’ to be a bit of a tight squeeze fer me, as ya mighta guessed!” Dave added.

“Are you calling me short?!” Karkat snapped.

In perfect sync, John and Dave replied, “You ARE short.” This elicited a pretty serious pout from Karkat.

“Whatever, let’s get this over with.” Karkat folded his arms.

“That’s more like it.” Dave retracted his hand, picking up a small crate cushioned with cloth. “Just pluck all them eggs, leave ‘em if they’re already cracked, an’ mind yer step. You’ll do fine.”

“You don’t believe in me at all.” Karkat huffed, but he took the crate anyway. Steeling himself while Dave got the feed, he stepped over the boundary and into the coop the minute the chickens were distracted with breakfast. It was pretty funny to watch the abrasive troll gingerly step around the tiny birds, snatching eggs from the coops and depositing them carefully in his crate until it was full.

“There, see?” Dave smiled as he took the full crate off of Karkat’s hands. “That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

Karkat shook his head. “I… guess not,” he replied, glancing over at a black rooster proudly strutting its way around the pen. “Hey look, it’s Eridan with feathers!”

John cracked up almost immediately, remembering the videos Sollux had taken of the pompous seadweller walking around his friends hives like he owned them.

“Yeah, that’s Norris.” Dave frowned at the bird. “Bit of a prick sometimes, but we came to an understandin’. I don’t bother him, he doesn’t bother me. I think he was a rescue from a rooster fightin’ ring or somethin’, I dunno. He’s certainly happier here.”

“That’s... that’s great, Dave. You really care about them, huh?” John leaned a little closer to look out over the chooks.

“Yeah, they’re pretty much my babies.” Dave shrugged, smiling softly. “I mean not really, but y’know? I care ‘bout em, make sure they get what they need an’ suchsame.”

John nodded in understanding. “Pretty neat!” He knelt down as one of the hens approached him curiously.

“You wanna hold her?” Dave asked kindly.

“Is it alright? I won’t get roundhouse-kicked or anything?”

“Yer fine, just be gentle, watch.” Slowly, Dave collected the chicken off the ground and placed her in John’s open arms, where she sat and looked around from the new point of view. “There ya go.” Dave showed John the correct way to hold and stroke her gently.

After a moment of petting, Karkat was handed a bit of feed, which the chicken ate out of his palms after being set down.

“Okay, I think we’ve worked up a good appetite!” Dave commented. “Let’s go see if Sol’s up yet.”

“Doubt it,” John said bluntly. “Remember that one time you both stayed asleep for almost a full day?”

“Fair point,” Dave admitted. “Still, it’s good for the soul out here. Reckon he just might’ve gotten a good night’s sleep and now he’ll be ready for some grub.”

Surprisingly, Dave was right. Sollux didn’t seem very awake, but he was out of bed and nursing a mug of reheated coffee when the three of them returned to the house.

John gave Sollux a quick kiss on the forehead and was rewarded with a tired smile as he left to shower. Rinsing off, even after just that little bit of work, felt heavenly, even if the heat necessitated a colder shower than John might’ve preferred. Still, getting to wash the sweat and dirt away was a relief John relished in.

As he washed off, though, he found himself noticing many of the same changes as he’d seen on Karkat. His stomach didn’t seem quite as flat as it had been the last time he’d showered, and whether it was the truth or his mind playing tricks on him, his arms and legs seemed minutely stockier as well. It couldn’t possibly all have been from that one meal, but then how hadn’t he noticed any of this before?

John’s self-reflection was interrupted by a banging on the door. “John, hurry up! You ain’t the only one who wants a shower here!” Karkat shouted.

“Just a sec!” John rushed through the rest of his shower and dried off quickly, wrapping a towel around his waist before letting Karkat in. Well, at least he could ask Karkat about what he’d noticed. “Hey, did you notice you, uh, weighed more? After last night?”

“How the fuck would one meal do enough to notice? Just ‘cause you can’t keep an eye on your weight doesn’t mean you can lump me in with your shit.” Before John could comment further, the bathroom door slammed between the two of them, the sound of the water being turned back on drowning out any reply John could think of.

Shrugging, John dressed and returned to the kitchen, watching as Dave fried up some french toast and bacon. The larger man was humming a little tune, hips shaking from side to side. John mostly ignored Dave’s dance to glance at his own boyfriend, trying to see any sign of extra pudge. And find some he did, much to his surprise - it was hard not to see on a wiry body like the yellowblood had.

The curve of Sollux’s belly was definitely visible as he stood up to rinse his cup out. His arms were filling out his sleeves a little more, though there was still some space left over. John blushed as he looked at Sollux’s rear, which was certainly filling out his skinny jeans more today.

“See something you like, Egbert?” Sollux asked teasingly. John blinked and gave what he hoped was a sly grin.

“Just a good lookin’ guy!”

“You stop that,” Sollux said flatly as Karkat entered the kitchen and noticed Dave’s antics. He immediately ambled over to hug Dave from behind and sighed at the softness.

“Hey cherry pop,” Dave said softly. “Mind settin’ the table fer me while I finish this up?”

“Yeah, sure.” Karkat agreed mildly, squeezing Dave lightly around the middle before detaching to do what he’d been asked to. The table was promptly set with a minimum of angry muttering, and not long after that Dave declared breakfast ready to eat.

He doled out a generous number of toast slices and bacon strips before taking his own seat. “Let’s dig in, y’all!” With that, Dave dove into his food, the others soon following suit. For the next several minutes, the only sounds were those of munching, chewing, and requests for the syrup until eventually Sollux spoke up.

“So, what did Dave have you guys doing?” he asked as he took a sip of orange juice.

“I went and picked some apples while Karkat got some eggs from the chickens,” John answered. “We even got to hold one!”

“That’s pretty neat!” Sollux looked mildly impressed. “There any other plans for today?”

“Not on the ranch there ain’t. That’s everythin’ needs to be done.” Dave shook his head. “Got the whole rest ‘a the day clear for you guys.”

John thought for a moment. “How about some Smash Bros?” he suggested. “Hope your skills haven’t gotten rusty while you’ve been out here, tubby!”

Dave’s laid-back expression immediately shifted into challenge mode. “Bring it, Johnny boy!”

Happy to see a reaction he recognised (and secretly glad his fat joke hadn’t caused offense), John grinned widely, sitting up more in his seat. Karkat, though, just groaned. “Fuck you both and your competitive streaks. Am I gonna have to get involved just to stop you from killing each other?”

“Name the terms,” John instructed dramatically. Sollux just rolled his eyes at his antics and collected the dishes as the others got up.

“Best two outta three, one on one,” Dave replied smoothly. “No special items… and I’ll be nice and set the time at… oh, let’s say five minutes per round. Agreed?”

“Agreed.” John stood and shook Dave’s hand. With that, he zipped over to the living room, with Dave close behind at a surprising speed considering his heft. Grumbling to himself, Karkat followed.

He found the two already taking their seats, with Dave’s generous rear occupying most of the couch with John off to one side. As the game booted up, he plopped himself down between them, leaning against Dave. “I’ll be referee,” Karkat said bluntly, leaving little room for debate.

Dave nodded in agreement. “Gotcha, hun.”

“No argument here,” John added.

With that settled and their characters selected, John and Dave’s tournament began. As they played, Sollux meandered in and leaned over the couch to watch, his arms loosely draped across John’s shoulders.

John’s Pikachu fought long and hard, even winning the first round, but Dave’s Samus eventually won out and triumphed as Dave’s meaty hands regained their muscle memory. “Yeah! In yer face Egderp, I still got it!” he crowed, fist-pumping. “But good game though!”

“Yeah… good game!” John grinned.

“Pop a squat and grab a controller, Sollux!” Dave said to Sollux, who went and sat in front of John. “Been forever since we had a good ol’ fashioned four way tourney!”

“What does the winner get?” Sollux asked, interested.

“Hm...” Dave considered, idly trying to push a controller into Karkat’s hands. “I could be obliged t’ make up a special dinner.”

This promise was enough to get Karkat eagerly clutching his controller. “I say bring it!”

“Well, if you’re sayin’ it!” Dave grinned, finally getting Karkat to grasp the controller. “C’mon, it’s a way ta spend the day, at least.”

And with that, the fun began, with Karkat going against Dave, and John against Sollux. Dave’s luck ran out, much to Karkat’s delight, and John managed to triumph against his own partner with a hard boot off the map. “Nooo!” Sollux whined.

“All’s fair in love and war, honeybee!” John cackled as he prepared to go against Karkat in the final match. It took a while, but eventually Karkat eked out a win!

“Ha! Victory is mine!” the shorter troll yelled out, throwing his arms up.

“Ey, congrats, cherry pop!” Dave grinned and pulled Karkat into a one-armed hug, pinning him against Dave’s side. Karkat’s response was to squirm around slightly and then kiss Dave firmly on the mouth.

“Can we have steaks?” Karkat asked. “I’ve been craving some all day!”

“Course, hun, we can do that fer tonight,” Dave replied, ruffling the rat’s nest of Karkat’s hair as he spoke. “Anythin’ with it?”

“How ‘bout baked taters?” John suggested. “Can’t go wrong with that!”

“That works for me,” Dave remarked idly, a hand on his chubby chin as he thought it over. “Easy enough, ain’t gonna break the bank or anythin’.”

“Great!” Karkat grinned. “Anything I can do to help?”

“Nah, I got it. You three have fun, I’ll holler when it’s ready.” With that, Dave heaved his body up and lumbered to the kitchen. Soon enough, there was the faint clatter of dishes being moved about, layered under Dave singing as he cooked.

“Well!” John smiled, stretching out in his seat. “That was a good start to the day, right?”

Sollux snorted. “We’re halfway through the afternoon, babe.”

“Really?” John glanced out the window, then over at an old clock on the mantle. “Damn, time flies when you’re having fun!” He didn’t think they’d played enough rounds to take up the whole morning, but then again he wasn’t watching the clock.

“Let’s see what else he has…” Karkat commented, getting up to inspect Dave’s collection of games. “Skyrim… Fallout… Jegus there’s a lot in here.” 

“Anything good?” Sollux called over.

“Hold your hoofbeasts.” Eventually, Karkat selected a game and popped it in. “This looks fun, I suppose.”

“Ooo, Uncharted, those are fun! I think Jake gave him that as a going away present,” John recollected. “Do you think Dave’s ever played it?”

“He’s had it a year, he has to at least have tried it.” Karkat shook his head, watching the console steadily boot up.

“I dunno, it seems kinda like he’s juggling a lot here! And Dave always liked his dumb vintage games more than any new release.” Nevermind that John had spent many of Dave’s college days playing those ‘dumb vintage games’ with him and enjoying himself thoroughly.

As he’d predicted, once the game loaded there was no previous save to speak of. “So, who wants to go first?” Karkat asked, holding out the controller.

“Give it here,” Sollux took it psionically and started up a new game. Karkat made himself comfortable in the seat Dave had vacated, nevermind the dent the larger male had left in his wake. John just reclined some more in his seat, letting his legs dangle over the arm of the chair as he watched.

Time seemed to fly no matter what one did at Dave’s house. The game was just as fun to criticise as it was to actually play, but since John had nothing to do he kept an eye on the clock, trying not to let the minutes tick away from them. Yet every time John looked away and back, the minute hand continued its relentless progression.

Eventually, the warm smell of cooked meat wafted through the house. “Steak’s on!” Dave called out, summoning his guests to the table. “Don’t forget to wash yer hands!” Sitting on the table was a platter of glistening steak, each huge and steaming every so often. There was also a massive baked potato sitting on each plate, alongside a slab of butter waiting to be sliced. It looked delicious, and John licked his lips at the sight.

Nobody sat at the table until Dave had watched them each wash their hands at the kitchen sink with the bar of soap there, at which point everyone else sat down while he poured them each a glass of apple juice, and then poured his own. Only once he’d sat down and taken up his cutlery did it feel right for everyone to dig in. As expected, the meal was to die for, each steak cooked to perfection, the potatoes just the right amount of tenderness… “Oh gog…” Karkat muttered. “This is too good!” This comment was met with similar sentiments from John and Sollux.

“Glad ya like it!” Dave bowed his head, almost looking flustered by the compliment. “I just made ‘em how I like ‘em, nothing big. Have as much as ya want, I don’ believe in leftovers in this house.”

“So I can see,” Karkat said teasingly. Quickly, he reached over and gave Dave a quick poke in the gut. “I mean, where else are you putting all this food? Ain’t in a hollow leg, that’s for sure!”

John stared, shocked and embarrassed both for Dave receiving such a question and Karkat even thinking of asking it. Instead of taking grave offense, though, Dave simply laughed boisterously and batted Karkat’s hand away before poking the troll right back. “Good t’ see you’ve still got yer backbone! Guess there ain’t much time for leftovers when I’m just as likely to clear ‘em myself. Don’t let that stop y’all from havin’ yer fills, though!”

Potential breakup averted before it began, John leaned back in his chair, stuffed full. “Oof… my compliments to the chef,” he commented. “You never cooked this good before you came down here! I thought you lived on microwaveables!”

“Well, havin’ access to a full kitchen where I can spread out instead of a broom closet I’d need t’ back out of to turn around in certainly helps. Not t’ mention havin’ Grammy’s cookbook to experiment with,” Dave explained. “But thank ya!”

“I remember your old kitchen, yeah, it was tiny!” John laughed and sighed at the memory. “Anything for dessert?”

“I didn’t make another pie, if that’s what yer anglin’ for.” Dave chuckled. “But I got ice cream in the freezer ta help with the heat.”

“What flavor?”

“Neopolitan.” Dave dug the tub from the freezer and set it on the counter to defrost slightly while he collected bowls, spoons, and the scoop. “There we go! Here’s hopin’ I’ve got enough fer four.”

Once the lid was frost-free enough to pry open, and it was confirmed that there was enough for all of them, Dave set about serving each of them a full bowl of the stuff. He dragged the scoop the whole length of the tub to make hearty servings with all three flavours evenly, ignorant of how John and Sollux’s eyes widened at the size of each portion. John wondered if his boyfriend felt as full as he did, staring down the massive dessert.

Sollux licked his lips at the sight, his spoon raised. “Dave, do we have any honey I can put on this?” Dave tossed over the bear-shaped bottle, from which Sollux immediately poured a thin layer of golden syrup onto his serving. Once satisfied, Sollux took a bite and moaned in delight. “So good!”

“You do you, dude,” John commented, covering his own with chocolate. “Me, I prefer the classics!” Somehow ignoring the massive dinner he’d just mowed through, he scooped out a big bite and couldn’t help a little moan of his own.

“Gog, stop being extra all the time and just eat!” Karkat hadn’t bothered to add anything to his ice cream - which John noted with something between confusion and jealousy was a bigger serve than he or Sollux had gotten, almost comparable to Dave’s own - and as such was already working through his bowl at a steady pace.

Dave simply had an amused smile on his face. “Boys, boys, yer both pretty,” he chided. “No need t’ fight!”

“Nah, we’re cool, bro!” John replied. He was glad to be one of those people who didn’t get brain freeze as he steadily shovelled spoonfuls into his mouth. The ice cream tasted perfect, and even though he was still stuffed from the steak, John’s stomach only wanted more.

Soon enough though, all four had finished and relaxed in their seats. “I haven’t said this enough lately,” Dave commented, rubbing his belly, “but I think I’m full!” As he spoke, he reached down and popped open the button of his jeans, groaning in relief as his belly sagged into the newly-freed space. John looked away, focusing instead on how red Karkat went at the act.

“Y-yeah, I’m pretty full too.” John had to resist the urge to rub his own stuffed gut, not wanting to draw attention to how much he’d overeaten just in the one meal. “I think I need to just... sit down for a bit.”

“Same here.” Sollux nodded slowly. “Might fuck around on my husktop or something. I never ended up plugging it in.” That was unlike him, to not even charge his device, let alone use it.

“Feel free to use the wifi, I ain’t got a password on it.” Dave waved absently in Sollux’s direction with the hand not rested on his belly.

Sollux nodded and let his eyes start glowing. With a soft grunt, Sollux levitated out of his chair and toward his room, surrounded by a faint blue-red corona of energy as he went. John just rolled his eyes at how lazy Sollux could be some times. “I swear, if laborious laziness was an Olympic sport, he’d be a gold medalist,” he said, more to himself than the others.

“He was like that even before we left Alternia,” Karkat commented, the shorter troll pulling up his shirt to massage his gut, revealing the candy-red grubscars on his sides. “Oof… Thanks for dinner, Dave. Was delicious!”

“Yer welcome, Karkles…” Dave smiled tiredly before yawning. “An’ there’s the food coma starting. Imma head to bed. G’night everyone!” Dave grunted as he stood up and waddled to his room.

With their host calling it for the night, there wasn’t much else to be done. Karkat dragged himself after Dave eventually, leaving John to heave himself up. It didn’t take too long to leave the dishes soaking in the sink and head back to his room, turning the lights off on the way. Sollux was at the guest room’s desk, tapping away at his husktop, but the human was feeling his own food coma starting up, and only managed his own mumbled ‘good night’ before collapsing in his own bed to sleep it off.


End file.
